As far as human occupied landfills go Junker’s Delight isn’t so bad. There’s edible food to be had (for a price) water that only gives you a little dysentery, the air doesn’t shred your throat like you’re swallowing a solution of diet-Pepsi and sand (which you are not) and as far as I’ve seen no one is going around cutting everyone’s heads off overly much. By the standards of the day it’s almost paradise, and much nicer than the actual place called Paradise we took off from in our plane before Martialla crashed it.
I’d like to talk to someone about how they need to get help us find the Invincible base since they’re the ones who wrecked the convoy on which this place depends but that’s where it becomes a problem that no one is really in charge. As far as I can tell here are the “power groups” of the area the True, the Antolpians, the guy who brings in the water, and a couple bigger gangs. The True already told us they’re too stupid and cowardly to do anything about the Invincible, so that means in theory that what I need to do is go around and speak to all the other groups and see who’ll take the bait. And then try to forge some kind of half-assed coalition against the Invincible like I just did back west.
The problem with that plan is that I don’t wanna. I’m tired of begging these future pus-bags to do things that are in their own best interests. Why can’t anyone see that I’m telling them the right thing and just do it? Why can’t people just talk to me once and then put me change their entire society? Is that too much to ask? I’m sick of it all. We were sitting out in one of the many junk-pavilions drinking some almost palatable moonshine and I was explaining this to Lucien and Martialla. I have no idea where Paul was skulking.
“So what we need to do is figure out a way to play these factions against one another and end up on top. We need to Yojimbo this place.”
Lucien frowned slightly “What’s a Yojimbo?”
I put my head in my hand “Jesus dude, have you ever even seen a movie?”
He shrugged “Must have come out after I was put underground.”
“Yojimbo came out in nineteen sixty-one! There is no excuse for you not to have seen it! Akira Kurosawa? No, nothing? It’s fantastic! How can you not have seen it? Do they not have movies in Canada?”
“Fistful of Dollars is the same movie beat for beat if you saw that” Martialla added unhelpfully.
Lucien halfway shrugged again “Don’t know that movie either. I was never much of one for movies, I felt like I had more important things to do than sitting around doing nothing in a dark room with a bunch of strangers.”
I frowned at him “You know I’m an actress right?”
He frowned back at me but more in confusion than my righteous anger “I thought you were a singer.”
“I’m both!”
“Uh, yeah . . . so . . . are you suggesting that I should pretend I like movies so as to not offend you? Do I have to pretend that I like whatever anyone else likes?”
“No” I said as I stomped away “Just things that I like so you don’t offend me!”
Lucien looked over to Martialla “Does she ever talk about anything other than movies?”
Martialla snickered “She talks about her ass sometimes. Which you can’t fault her for on honestly, it’s a blue ribbon ass. If you like that sort of thing.”
Lucien shook his head like an old school marm “In the year two thousand does everyone talk like you two? Such language.”
Martialla’s snicker turned into a laugh “You’re highly persnickety for an army man.”
“Sure but you have to remember I’m, ah that is to say, was in, the Canadian army.”
Martialla nodded “Oh right.”
Awesome first line. I also really related to the desire to be put in charge of an entire society.