I bet urologists have seen worse

When I woke up Martynova was already gone.  I picked up the tailgate special from Chicken Express.  50 spicy tenders, corn on the cob, cheese sticks, mac & cheese, coleslaw, apple pie, biscuits with gravy, and 2 gallons of sweet tea for 34 bucks.  I hope some cold chicken is thanks enough for her help.  I don’t have much else to offer. 

I have a show in Odessa tomorrow night.  That’s only a 3-hour drive so I had some time to see what was up Alpha Chi Delta bro.  I was able to find his apartment easily enough since everyone puts everything on social media.  It’s not that far from the apartment where Red Rose’s sister lived.   

I fell asleep on the stake-out.  I’ve been feeling run down lately.  Soft living like having a bed and regularly getting 8 hours of sleep a night can change your internal clock so quickly.  When I woke up I reverted back to online stalking and saw that he was at a bar called the Library.  If there’s a college town that doesn’t have a bar named the Library I haven’t found it yet.   

I went in and had a few drinks myself while I watched Alpha Chi Delta and his pals drink loudly and shove their phones in each other’s faces.  I wonder if they were watching anything nefarious or just the usual videos of snowboarders breaking their legs and “treat an old person like shit challenge”.   

I tailed him when he left.  I was prepared to use my malfunction spell to stop his car in a good location but he did my work for me and pulled over to piss by Mackenzie Park.  When he saw me walking up to him he snickered.  Men do that sometimes when they see me.  Like just looking at me is funny to them.  I don’t let it bother me. 

I knocked him down with a slap.  You have to slap someone hard to knock them down but it’s not impossible.   As he was getting up I slapped him again and his pants got tangled around his legs and he went flying like he was diving down a water slide.  Only instead of water it was gravel.  While his dick was flapping around.   

He started crying but I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that was because he had a rock in his ureter rather than because of a couple hard slaps.  I got him by the collar and pinned him with my knee and told him that I had talked to his buddy.  I told him that he had helped a man murder 5 people with his magic necklace.  I asked him where he got it from.  He said that he made it.  I gave him a good shake and asked him how.   

“I found a book” he screamed into the gravel. 

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