Everyone knows that Taskmaster is the best and most popular Marvel character. I mean he has a skull mask AND a cape. Name one other guy that looks like that. Plus he has the swordmanship skills of founding Avenger member Black Knight. And we all know how the mainstream populace loves Black Knight.
For anyone who’s been living under a rock the Taskmaster ability (is it a power? Like Bullseye it’s has’t been made clear if it’s super or just “normal”) is to perfectly copy anything he sees anyone doing. He carries a bow because he saw Hawkeye shooting a bow once so he’s as good at shooting a bow as Hawkeye. He carries a shield because he has the shield using abilities of Captain America. This one is odd because while Cap is probably pretty good at doing shield stuff it’s the combination of indestructible magic shield and super-strength that are carrying the load there. Similarly he can also throw a hammer as good as Thor, which is much less impressive since he doesn’t have Mjolnir.
The Taskmaster has decided to use his abilities mostly to rob banks and shit. Sometimes he sets himself up as a trainer for villain henchman. At first I thought “this guy would be a horrible coach” because he just has to see something once and then he can do it. There’s no way he understand how hard it is for normal people to learn things. But then I realized he probably watched someone who was a good coach once so he is a good coach because of that.
But the question before us today is what should the Taskmaster be doing with his photo-reflexive blah blah jargon ability? He could watch someone adjust a claim and then be a claims adjuster. He could watch someone be a night janitor and then be a night janitor. What’s the world’s most lucrative skill?
Playing sports comes to mind, but then we come back to the shield thing. Taskmaster has the skills to be as good as LeBron James but does he have the physical abilities to be as good? He seems like he’s in pretty good shape. This is something I was wondering about regarding my other blog – hugely popular and read by millions – if you have the superpower of uncanny targeting but are not athletic could you make it in the NBA? You’d never miss a shot, but could you ever get a shot off?
Anyway, Taskmaster has the skills of every great basketball player ever and I think he has the physical prowess good enough to be not the best but a top 10 player. The average salary of the highest paid NBA players is 42 million a year. Pretty good. But can we do better?
If we want to make some real money let’s turn to a sport where athletic ability means nothing – baseball. Shockingly the highest paid player in MLB “only” makes 38 million a year. I always heard that baseball players get all the money which seemed off since baseball is boring garbage. Looks like baseball players get more money on average but the top salaries are comparable to the NBA. Which makes sense because I’m told their salaries are high based on the strength of their union. The top guys are always going to make money, the union is there to protect the “little guy” who only makes 2.5 million a year.
Taskmaster could be the best pitcher and hitter ever so he’d probably make more – let’s say 60 million a year. Pretty good, but is there something more lucrative than pro sports? Look at the three richest people in the world – Musk, Bezos, and Gates. They ain’t no athletes.
I actually don’t know what skills, if any, Jeff Bezos has, he may have “just” come up with the idea of selling shit online. But Musk and Gates are nerds. So the Taskmaster could watch them being nerds and then nerd just like they could. But would that mean anything? They’ve already invented the stuff they’re going to invent, so learning how to invent it by watching does you no good? Is inventing new stuff a skill you can learn?
Warren Buffett’s pretty rich based on investing, which is a skill. So that’s probably the way to go, watch Warren Buffet investing, copy his investing skills, then use your 60 million you got from playing baseball to invest and then you’re off to the races. And in your spare time you could also be the best actor in the world. Not the best singer, because there’s a biophysiological component to that, but still a top 40 singer for sure. And the best painter.
Or you could just shoot arrows at Scarlet Johansson because you have to do what you love. Life isn’t all about money you know.
Rocket Cat 