I never thought about what a bed and breakfast was. Turns out it’s some people in a fancy house that rent you a room, or bed if you will, and make you breakfast. It was easily the nicest place I’ve ever been. It was just a big house I’m sure but I couldn’t stop myself from thinking of it as a mansion.
In books and movies sometime they have the poor character feel intimidated and afraid of being in a nice place and pining to be back in their cardboard box. I always thought that was stupid before. Now I kind of get it. But only a little.
Not only was it the nicest place I’ve ever stayed, the breakfast was fucking delicious. I don’t even know what it was but it was wonderful. I ate enough for a couple people. I don’t care what they thought about it.
And it was free! The gas station lady sent me this way because the B&B lady didn’t have anyone booked that night and likes to help out “people like me”. I guess there’s a benefit to driving a 40 year old car and wearing borrowed clothing.
I only got to stay there one night but it was the best thing that’s happened to me maybe ever. I asked the B&B lady about the supernatural history of the area. She wasn’t into it like the gas station lady. She did show me a book that a guy wrote about the disappearances gas station lady mentioned.
I thought she was kidding when she asked if I wanted to meet the author but she was totally serious. Her husband knew the guy from some 1 percenter club. I had to cancel another show and sleep in my car for a while but next thing I know I’m meeting with a fucking professor at fucking Cornell. Fucking.
I got some weird looks on my way to see the professor but that didn’t bother me. He was a super old man with a Santa beard. He looked like the professor character they put in every college sex movie. He was a professor of medieval studies. That’s good for him I guess but it’s hard for me to understand why a guy who seemingly does nothing drives a Lexus while people that work for a living get jack shit.
He talked about the book for a while and his theory that the disappearances were due to the work of a ritual killer. We danced around it for a while like people in a drug deal who worry that the other one might be a cop but eventually we got there. He thinks the killer was doing magic. Because he’s magic too.
