Shove another ‘cast in your podhole

There’s exactly one zillion wrestling podcasts in the world.  I have a hard time believing that anyone listens to most of them but then again what else do wrestling fans have to do?  Not have sex am I right?  I did a double shot in Austin last weekend and some dude was sitting on a folding chair “backstage” gassing on about his podcast and how it was going to make him a star.  I don’t think it works like that, no one is going to listen to the podcast of a Chili’s assistant manager in LaGrange who wrestles twice a month in front of fifteen people.  You have to already be famous for anyone to listen to your podcast – it’s not going to make you famous.

But since every wrestler has to have a podcast here’s what mine is going to be.  I’m going to have a podcast where a celebrity guest – A-listers only – and I discuss just the first scene of every episode of law and order.  That opening three minute scene where a jogger or a guy driving a truck finds the dead body and then at the end one of the detectives really lays a zinger out there about the dead person and/or the way they died and/or the potential murderer.

For example we’d watch the first part of the 1999 episode “Empire” and then we’d talk extensively about Lenny’s wham line “Looks like he got SOMETHING straight!” because he was talking about the dead guy’s dick.  We’d really do a deep dive on how that joke was about the dead guy’s erect penis.  Was it really straight?  Most of them curve up.  Some of them curve to the side.  We’d really dig into the joke about the dead guy’s dick. 

Has anyone used a podcast to get over?  Colt Cabana is the only name that comes to mind, but it’s impossible to say if the podcast made him more popular or if his popularity made the podcast successful.  Maybe there’s some synergy there but when he started his podcast he was already 10 years into his career and had a ton of friends that were big stars that he could interview.  Plus he’s charismatic and interesting.  Maybe a podcast can bump you up once you’re already making a good living in the biz?

I admit that I should be doing more on social media to promote myself but it’s all so tedious.  Plus look what happened to Sonia Deville.  I guess Mandy Rose was the one that was going to be murdered, but Sonia was the one being stalked.  So.  That’s the good thing about technically being homeless – if anyone wants to stalk me they have to really be dedicated.

As far as I know there aren’t any podcasts about learning magic.  Maybe that’s my lane.